Imagine this- I walk in home (after dinner and live roadside performance of Eef you come today by Eyefry and Antickpix) and find my brother giggling hysterically. At Madhuri Dixit and Anil Kapoor flying around and singing to each other. In Mallu attire. Her saree has a blue border, which makes her look like a nurse. Bollywood's stab at realism, eh? And what are they singing to each other (in the voices of S.P. Balasubramaniam and Asha Bhonsle)? Batata Vadaa...
Ok now, getting mental picture? Now listen to the song to set the mood... Listening? Good. By now our airborne lovebirds are holding hands. And he's shoving a Batata Vada into her mouth... Yes, mid-air.
Scene change, Costume change! Tacky sets, lots of dry ice, large Batata Vadaas in the background. He's now a tam brahm complete in a veshti, angavastram and kudumi, playing the mridangam, while she's in a madisaar and doing Bharatnatyam moves to, well, Batata Vadaaaa...
And before you can get over that, they're suddenly transformed into fisherfolk pretending to row a boat with a huge Batata Vada in the middle. He's wearing one of those triangular knee length lungi-type things, showing off his hairy legs to best advantage. And she, the bum divider saree...
You have to see it to believe it.
p.s. The song's from the movie Hifazat. And the above song featured in a program called Anmol Ratan on Channel [V]. Can't think of a more appropriate title...
p.p.s. Can't find it on you tube/ google video. Does anyone know where else I can find it? I think this has the potential to rival the cult status of Eef you come today... Hey, which reminds me, have y'all seen the new Rajkumar video? Presenting (drumroll please) Love Me or Hate Me (Younger Brother of Eef you come today) ...
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Do not, I implore you, patronise Le Club, the 'French' restaurant on Khader Nawaz Khan Road.
Unless you want to be the only one(s) eating there.
Unless you want to eat Paneer Butter Masala. Or Satays. Their French selection is rather limited, y'see.
Unless you want a ghastly green light shining in your face. Or a ghastly red light. Or a ghastly blue light. Depends on where you're sitting.
Unless you want to eat Mushroom Crepes that taste like Mushroom Spring-rolls.
The kitschy menu and setting, I suppose, are deliberate. Doesn't work, sadly. We were forced to hotfoot it to the Subway outlet just across the road. Which fortunately sells delicious Gelato. I very highly recmommend the double scoop of After Eight and Chocolate flavours. Not an entirely wasted evening. But we were going to eat the Gelato anyway.
Completely unrelated: Casa Picola is to open soon on KNK road. Hopefully that'll live up to expectations.
Unless you want to be the only one(s) eating there.
Unless you want to eat Paneer Butter Masala. Or Satays. Their French selection is rather limited, y'see.
Unless you want a ghastly green light shining in your face. Or a ghastly red light. Or a ghastly blue light. Depends on where you're sitting.
Unless you want to eat Mushroom Crepes that taste like Mushroom Spring-rolls.
The kitschy menu and setting, I suppose, are deliberate. Doesn't work, sadly. We were forced to hotfoot it to the Subway outlet just across the road. Which fortunately sells delicious Gelato. I very highly recmommend the double scoop of After Eight and Chocolate flavours. Not an entirely wasted evening. But we were going to eat the Gelato anyway.
Completely unrelated: Casa Picola is to open soon on KNK road. Hopefully that'll live up to expectations.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Drama
My watch gets stolen. The thief found, and roughed up a little. Who then dutifully pisses out of fear. Never seen a grown man do that before...
Sunday, May 14, 2006
In Which
I sneer at everyone who takes The Da Vinci Code seriously.
Since I've been sneered at for not (Loser! How could you? Sacrilege! etc.)... Also because I happen to be literate.
But really, don't you think the surest sign of a book's mediocrity lies in its extreme success?
Since I've been sneered at for not (Loser! How could you? Sacrilege! etc.)... Also because I happen to be literate.
But really, don't you think the surest sign of a book's mediocrity lies in its extreme success?
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
From Gore Vidal's very interesting essay, Who Makes the Movies?*
... "In the Fifties when I came to MGM as a contract writer and took my place at the Writer's table in the commissary, the Wise Hack used to tell us newcomers, 'The director is the brother-in-law.' Apparently the ambitious man became a producer (that's where the power was). The talented man became a writer (that's where the creation was). The pretty man became a star."...
... "As the French theorists made their way across the Atlantic, bemused brothers-in-law found themselves being courted by odd-looking French youths with tape recorders. Details of long-forgotten Westerns were recalled and explicated. Every halting word from the auteur's lips were taken down and reverently examined. The despised brothers-in-law of the Thirties were now Artists."...
Hmm...
... "I thought of a solution, which I delivered into Wyler's good ear. 'As boys they were lovers, now Messala wants to continue the affair. Ben-Hur rejects him. Messala is furious. Chagrin d'amour, the classic motivation for murder.
Wyler looked at me like I'd gone mad. 'But we can't do that! I mean this is Ben-Hur! My God...'
'We won't really do it. We just suggest it. I'll write the scenes so that they will make sense to those who are tuned in. Those who are will still feel that Messala's rage is somehow emotionally logical.'
I don't think Wyler particularly like my solution but he agreed that 'anything is better than what we've got. So let's try it.' "...
What?! Charlton Heston played a gay character?
Must watch Ben-Hur again...
* First published in the New York Review of Books, November 25, 1976. Again in the collection titled Pink Triangle & Yellow Star and other essays 1976-1982.
... "In the Fifties when I came to MGM as a contract writer and took my place at the Writer's table in the commissary, the Wise Hack used to tell us newcomers, 'The director is the brother-in-law.' Apparently the ambitious man became a producer (that's where the power was). The talented man became a writer (that's where the creation was). The pretty man became a star."...
... "As the French theorists made their way across the Atlantic, bemused brothers-in-law found themselves being courted by odd-looking French youths with tape recorders. Details of long-forgotten Westerns were recalled and explicated. Every halting word from the auteur's lips were taken down and reverently examined. The despised brothers-in-law of the Thirties were now Artists."...
Hmm...
... "I thought of a solution, which I delivered into Wyler's good ear. 'As boys they were lovers, now Messala wants to continue the affair. Ben-Hur rejects him. Messala is furious. Chagrin d'amour, the classic motivation for murder.
Wyler looked at me like I'd gone mad. 'But we can't do that! I mean this is Ben-Hur! My God...'
'We won't really do it. We just suggest it. I'll write the scenes so that they will make sense to those who are tuned in. Those who are will still feel that Messala's rage is somehow emotionally logical.'
I don't think Wyler particularly like my solution but he agreed that 'anything is better than what we've got. So let's try it.' "...
What?! Charlton Heston played a gay character?
Must watch Ben-Hur again...
* First published in the New York Review of Books, November 25, 1976. Again in the collection titled Pink Triangle & Yellow Star and other essays 1976-1982.
Monday, May 08, 2006
Caught up with some old friends yesterday...
K, B and I watched Basic Instinct 2 (Bad. Avoid.), and then went out for dinner. A, I met on Orkut, and we spoke after about 4 years.
Found out that K has a girlfriend who he's 'committed' to- that probably means he'll marry her. And said things like 'There's no such thing as love, da. I'm talking from Experience!". B nodded sagely. Also from Experience, I suppose.
Over Sczechuan noodle dosa (don't ask), B told me about his plans- knows exactly what he wants, and how he'll go about getting what he wants. Lots of money, wife, two kids, house(s), car(s), dog.
A is about to patent new technology that he thinks will revolutionise the tech industry. Oh, did I mention that he's also doing his MBA at IIMB? Asked me where I see myself 15 years from now. Ouch.
Freaks me out, this kind of plannedness.
K, B and I watched Basic Instinct 2 (Bad. Avoid.), and then went out for dinner. A, I met on Orkut, and we spoke after about 4 years.
Found out that K has a girlfriend who he's 'committed' to- that probably means he'll marry her. And said things like 'There's no such thing as love, da. I'm talking from Experience!". B nodded sagely. Also from Experience, I suppose.
Over Sczechuan noodle dosa (don't ask), B told me about his plans- knows exactly what he wants, and how he'll go about getting what he wants. Lots of money, wife, two kids, house(s), car(s), dog.
A is about to patent new technology that he thinks will revolutionise the tech industry. Oh, did I mention that he's also doing his MBA at IIMB? Asked me where I see myself 15 years from now. Ouch.
Freaks me out, this kind of plannedness.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Yet another MSM mention. Outlook magazine this time.
Striking similarities between a film review by a senior journalist with the Times of India and a review of the same film by a Chicago Sun Times reviewer hit blogosphere first. So did similar charges about The Hindu's film reviewer. Both reviewers continue to review, and if any actions were taken by their employers, they are not in the public domain.
I know, I know, barely there. But I insist on taking credit! :P
Striking similarities between a film review by a senior journalist with the Times of India and a review of the same film by a Chicago Sun Times reviewer hit blogosphere first. So did similar charges about The Hindu's film reviewer. Both reviewers continue to review, and if any actions were taken by their employers, they are not in the public domain.
I know, I know, barely there. But I insist on taking credit! :P
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Have been reading R.K. Laxman's Idle Hours. Excerpts-
Holiday in The Islands
There are 350 odd islands in this area. Their very names are fascinating to hear: they have a ring of romance and mystery about them, as if the names had been given to them by a fiction writer of a very popular variety: The Labyrinth, Snake, Theresa, Sir Hugh Ross, Harriet, etc. Mercifully they are still out of the reach of our name-changers over here. But for how long? I wonder. Already there is a move to name these islands after one of the ubiquitous freedom-fighters.
Not much has changed in the 20 odd years since this was written, eh?
After a long wait I ask the Inspector, 'Have you ever seen a Jarva here?' dropping my voice apparently low in deference to the general atmosphere.
They attacked this outpost only last month. They came up to the edge of the ladder here. Our men here fired and they took to their heels.'
'Did you kill any?' I ask.
He looks at me in horror. 'Certainly not! We have strict orders not to shoot to kill or hurt, but only to scare them away.'
My attention is diverted suddenly. I see some movement far away. At once we turn our binoculars and stare till our eyes pop-out. It is some time before we discover it is only a spotted deer teaching its young one the trick of vaulting over a bush. It is time for us to return. And not one Jarva seen.
Substitute Jarva with say, tiger. Or lion, or any other wild animal you can think of.
Impressions of Kathmandu
Foreign tourists are flocking into the antique shops. I hear an European lady ask one of the shopkeepers, 'This is Buddha. Yes?' I look at he foot-high bronze image she is pointing to in the showcase. It is the goddess Tara sitting in the classical pose on a lotus, stripped to the waist.
...
'Do you like Nepal?' asks one of my countrymen.
'Yes very much.' I reply.
'Been to casinoes and night clubs?'
'No, I have no time for them.'
'No time? Then what do you do in a place like this?'
Has to be a Punjabi, what?
Idle Hours in the USA
He (a hippie) further declared that if an electric iron or a blender or any electric appliance went out of order he never threw it away; he repaired it himself and used it again. Finally he said, 'Even my car I haven't changed even though it is nearly five years old...' and proudly thumped his chest; the bells jingled and the glass beads tinkled. I sat dumbfounded and amazed at the effort one has to put in in that country to remain poor!
... If the hippie I met in the park did not watch out, prosperity would sweep him off and he would end up as the vice-president of some industry or other and live for ever suffering from affluence.
I was astonished at this young boy's sense of duty and helpful nature. I expressed my admiration and complimented the father. My friend laughed and said, 'Sure Jim is helpful; but he is paid to do all this around the house, like tonight. He is a smart guy, though! He has made such a lot of money he has invested it all in stocks! If I don't watch out maybe he will buy up my company one day!'
Heh.
Holiday in The Islands
There are 350 odd islands in this area. Their very names are fascinating to hear: they have a ring of romance and mystery about them, as if the names had been given to them by a fiction writer of a very popular variety: The Labyrinth, Snake, Theresa, Sir Hugh Ross, Harriet, etc. Mercifully they are still out of the reach of our name-changers over here. But for how long? I wonder. Already there is a move to name these islands after one of the ubiquitous freedom-fighters.
Not much has changed in the 20 odd years since this was written, eh?
After a long wait I ask the Inspector, 'Have you ever seen a Jarva here?' dropping my voice apparently low in deference to the general atmosphere.
They attacked this outpost only last month. They came up to the edge of the ladder here. Our men here fired and they took to their heels.'
'Did you kill any?' I ask.
He looks at me in horror. 'Certainly not! We have strict orders not to shoot to kill or hurt, but only to scare them away.'
My attention is diverted suddenly. I see some movement far away. At once we turn our binoculars and stare till our eyes pop-out. It is some time before we discover it is only a spotted deer teaching its young one the trick of vaulting over a bush. It is time for us to return. And not one Jarva seen.
Substitute Jarva with say, tiger. Or lion, or any other wild animal you can think of.
Impressions of Kathmandu
Foreign tourists are flocking into the antique shops. I hear an European lady ask one of the shopkeepers, 'This is Buddha. Yes?' I look at he foot-high bronze image she is pointing to in the showcase. It is the goddess Tara sitting in the classical pose on a lotus, stripped to the waist.
...
'Do you like Nepal?' asks one of my countrymen.
'Yes very much.' I reply.
'Been to casinoes and night clubs?'
'No, I have no time for them.'
'No time? Then what do you do in a place like this?'
Has to be a Punjabi, what?
Idle Hours in the USA
He (a hippie) further declared that if an electric iron or a blender or any electric appliance went out of order he never threw it away; he repaired it himself and used it again. Finally he said, 'Even my car I haven't changed even though it is nearly five years old...' and proudly thumped his chest; the bells jingled and the glass beads tinkled. I sat dumbfounded and amazed at the effort one has to put in in that country to remain poor!
... If the hippie I met in the park did not watch out, prosperity would sweep him off and he would end up as the vice-president of some industry or other and live for ever suffering from affluence.
I was astonished at this young boy's sense of duty and helpful nature. I expressed my admiration and complimented the father. My friend laughed and said, 'Sure Jim is helpful; but he is paid to do all this around the house, like tonight. He is a smart guy, though! He has made such a lot of money he has invested it all in stocks! If I don't watch out maybe he will buy up my company one day!'
Heh.
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